Saturday, September 25, 2004

  • It's amazing how living circumstances changes things.
  • I need to understand the shame that renders me a christian.
  • No power, no pride. All Him.
  • I am sickly insecure.

Thursday, September 23, 2004

And when I go there...

"I want to run
I want to hide
I want to tear down the walls
That hold me inside
I want to reach out
And touch the flame
Where the streets have no name"

A lot of things work like Pandora's box. It's a theme that runs throughout human history, within our individual lives. 'The story of one man is the story of humanity' says Coelho. Pandora is me, and I've nothing to say for it. Still in the process of building and burning, I shift into a new mode of existance, one that challenges and contradicts but with refreshing truth. What else is there to be done since it's been opened? Sit back and enjoy the ride.

"It's all I can do"

Where the streets have no name ~ U2

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

I am starting to become free from my crippling deconstructive nature. The chains are loosening, tide is waning. Oh, lookie here, a trickle of emotion. An expression of trust. Good dinner and conversation.

Waddaya know?
I might just be human after all.

Tuesday, September 21, 2004


The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?
~ Jeremiah 17:9

Don't look at me!

Monday, September 20, 2004

Who would have thought?

That's my primary problem. In thinking so much, I really miss out on the important things. I think God has been bringing this problem into the forefront of my consciousness. Knowledge and understanding should never be my idol, but really, my tool. As today's sermon suggested, the objectivity that results from my exessive post-modernist deliberations might well be stifling my ability to live rather then intensifying it, as it was initially meant to do.

I am not secular. I am not dead. Live and let live, abundently and joyfully.
"The Lord God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being" ~ Genesis 2:7

Let me re-learn what it means to be human