Saturday, June 27, 2009

I smiled deeply today, for the first time in a long while. I'm starting to appreciate necessity and the gifts she brings.

I remember how, at the beginning of this school year in September, I woke up one morning in Singapore and proclaimed in a confident voice that I KNEW this year would be good: I would grow, I would make good friends and I would do well in school. It has all come to pass. God is faithful.

I also had an epiphany yesterday. I don't have to take it personally.

Now, I just hold my breathe and wait for the downward ride.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Days like these

Sometimes, my hand is being held.
Sometimes, I am holding her hand.
Always, it's hard to know which I am being: the active or the passive, the helped or the helper.

But never am I he, for I am ever she.

One man, he disappoint me. He give me the gouge and he take my glee. Now every other man I see, reminds me of the one man who disappoint me.

But wait till I get him back. He won't have a back to scratch. Yeah, keep turning that chin and you will see my face as I figure how to kill what I cannot catch.

So I say, and on I go to another one to disappoint me so.

The next one up was a contemptible snob. He lived to put things in their place. He did a commendable job. He put himself so low. He can hardly even look me in the face

He made my blood just burn. I flipped so far, I thought that I would not return.

~ Get Him Back :: Fiona Apple.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

I fear that I have no art or greatness in me. Or at least, not enough to sustain it all.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

What keeps me sane.

Lobster girl says:
hu li jing???

Hannah :: HU LI JING! says:
I was thinking of him

Lobster girl says:
You can't call a man a hu li jing

Hannah :: HU LI JING! says:
why not?

Lobster girl says:
Its for WOMEN!

Hannah :: NI SHI GE HU LI JING! says:

Lobster girl says:
Respect the language!!

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Huh? What?