Saturday, June 24, 2006

Happy brithday Gladys!

Here's to nine and a half years of friendship and the secret security of its continued existance.

Friday, June 23, 2006

I have spent more time with Gladys, and will continue to do so.
Thank you for seeing the things in me that need to be seen. And for warning me of what I need to be warned about and for being honest.

"Aren't you glad mother? I have girl friends!"
To mother dearest as I tell her my plans for the evening. I find it absolutely incredible that Angie and I cannot remember the last time we met, because it feels like only yesterday.

"You used to be so compliant!"
Angie to me when I glaringly refused to carry her shopping. Alright, somethings do change, but only within the context of togetherness.

And with Deborah, nothing's too late.
I wish I were wiser earlier.

In His time, In His time
He makes all things beautiful, in His time
Lord please show me everyday,
As you're teaching me your way,
That you do just what you say,
In Your time.

Such truth revealed in Lao.

Now if only Mr DC had been at home. That would've been a blast.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

I am seeking to fill my time with people. I get restless alone and conversely, very happy when I'm with people. I think I'm at the stage of my life where being alone is a waste of time and myself. So it's people people people for as much as I can handle. Not to say that I cannot/do not want to be alone, I just think I'm in a different phase of my life.

People me up.

That being said, thank you for calling me Thi, just to chat and catch up. I feel like I've lived an important chunk of my life in a different reality, removed and apart from this one. That being said, it needs to be validated and made tangible. This did it for me.

I am alive.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Stretch... yawn...


I've been asleep way too much since I returned from Vietnam. I slept at 2 am Tuesday morning, to awake again at 10 am. Went out for lunch, sent off some letters and bought groceries and returned home at 1 pm. I slept from 1.30 to 6.30, waking to go to dinner with my family at Tomako, returning at 9. I slept again from 2 am to 9 am Wednesday.

But it is good, I think travelling has been heavy on my soul and while drifting off to a troubled sleep last night, I found myself needing to evaluate... my values. My being has been substantialy changed while being on the road, and I find that I cannot be true and still be me.

Oh hang it all, all this existential crap. I just want to live simply and spend more time with Gladys.

Monday, June 19, 2006

I'm on my way home to resume normality. I'm still suspended between the three different realities laid on my lap this three weeks. I think my desire for belonging causes me to fall in love with every random rock who orbit crosses my path. But here I am, suspension without suspense.

As Thiyachai noted in his email, it's hard to explain what happened in the past three weeks. It was more then experience, it was transformation. And a transformation who's outstretched fingers are too subtle to really count. I have three hours to mull over the crossing of borders, internationally, termporally and emotionally.

Now then, instead of history pushing us forward, maybe the future rushes in to draw us into higher heights and brighter beings.

Overwhelm me like the sea.