and suddenly, it all began to matter.

It is a new and subtle feeling to not be missing something or someone, to feel complete whole and balanced.

Things to do with my life:

1. French lessons
   
   Goal: Fluency
   Purpose: To be able to communicate with the Quebec boyfriend in his native language.
   
   
2. Chinese lessons
   
   Goal: Fluency
   
   Purpose: I am Chinese and since so much time, money and effort was spent on my learning the language 10 years ago, I'd like to make something of it. Also, I want to be able to understand Chinese law when I need to.
   
   
   
3. Dance lessons
   
   Goal: Performance
   Purpose: I've got to be able to do SOMETHING with my body, and I want to do it well.
   
   
4. Volunteer
   
   Goal: Here, and stints abroad
   
   Purpose: To give! And to enjoy myself whilst doing so. I've never been a fan of those short-term missions stints, but I think I could get into that, as long as I'm less of a bane than a boon.
   
   
5. Music
   
   Goal: Live in it
   
   Purpose: Because it really keeps me alive. Jam more, vocal lessons, listen more. More more more.
   

It's quite pointless worrying about the intangibles. Important as they may be, worrying seems to be the wrong approach, to anything at all, actually. Just move.

On a separate note, if you're not here, where are you that matters?