Moving

Life on steroids, it doesn't get any better then this. Mourning is over in exactly 7 days and for now, I'm just trippy.

I want your heart on a platter... with whipped cream
~Ireti

I missed Seth today. Quite badly, and I wonder why.
Ah well, life is beautiful. I'm crusing and resting.

I wonder what God has in store next.

Faith to faith, glory to glory.

Life isn't and shouldn't be easy, but it should be fulfilling. I don't think one can accomplish that by taking the path of least resisitance. Of course we need to evaluate our priorities and really ask ourselves if this is what we want. We need to make informed, or at the very least, conscious, decisions.

Carry the cross, count the loss, cut the crap.

I believe that human beings were built to be empowered. And in order to do that, we're going to have to realise that we're more then just a bunch of nerve endings. Physically and spiritually.

Who are you really? And where do you want to go?
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In other news...

Gong si fa cai.

I had the most amazing CNY dinner ever.

So three days ago, Shu and I were at Regent college studying when we catch a couple of Singaporean accents from the next table.

"Are you Singaporean?"
"Yeah, but I've been here for 11 years."
"You would't happen to know my Dad do you? Lim Cheng Siew?"
"I do!"

I've never asked that question before. It never crosses my mind. Especially not with a random middle aged guy who immigrates to Canada years after my family leaves.

What's the deal?

So I had CNY dinner at Uncle Hwee Yang's place with Shu and Dustin. We meet the most amazing people, and hear the most amazing stories.

With lives like these, how can we not believe in God?
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I praise God for the journey that he's brought me through. For every step along the way and every corner turned. I find my limits being pushed and expanded.

My relationship with Seth has totally revolutionized my faith. I realise that the only thing that's the same is that Jesus is God, Lord and my personal Saviour. Other then that, you wouldn't recognise me. And I like it this way.

I feel alive and true.

I have moments of weakness where I become less then I really am, but hey.. we'll get there.

The heart is in bloom.

I think I've eaten enough of this bullshit to warrent misery. Really, I am alive and I intend to express that. The world is beautiful and moving. Shouldn't I be too?

It's a beautiful day.
I know I'm not a hopeless case

I love regent lectures.
They speak truth and grace into my life.

I'm learning to live by being myself, to be independent from what society tells me, to be free.

In other news, the holes are being filled.
Slowly.
Very slowly.

I think all our problems, hurt, insecurties and pain come from the inability to recognise who we really are and where we stand and belong. The process of becoming isn't easy, and it probably isn't meant to be charted.

But for now I struggle to remember who I am and what I have to do.
I struggle mostly with letting go of what isn't mine anymore, of what isn't congruenent to my identity.

There's only so much I can take, so I should stop taking more.
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The hurt is washed away, but still here I am in the middle of it all with heavy hands. And I try so hard just to leave behind me, all the chains that bind me.

I won't back down, won't turn my head around,

Quick, take a recess, oops, take another breath,

Guess who, who's you, better take another crew,

Find out, all about, just don't doubt, just don't doubt

And I won't be lost in these watered down dreams that surround me.
I won't be caught up in the moment of the day.

Human beings were created with holes that were meant to be filled.
They can be filled with just about anything.

And you can be satisfied to the fullest.

But will you be free?