Saturday, September 24, 2005

Teach me

To be oblivious to myself.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

My life is brilliant

So after 3 weeks of non-connectivity I am finally hooked onto the internet and am returning to the blogsphere. To my faithful readers, if there are any left, if there were any to begin with, I apologise for the long hiatus, though I have to say that the rest away from the internet world was just amazing. Freedom beats convienience anytime. Like what they say in my Sociology textbook.

"We are inclined to think of hunters and gathers as poor because they don't have anything; perhaps better to think of them for that reason as free"
~ Sahlin

There must be an angel,
with a smile on her face.

Many people have been asking about the house, about the people and about my life in general. And I would fain turn this post into a self-focussed monologue about my sorry little existance, but I would say this: Living here is the best. The people are wonderful and school is well, as it should be.

When she thought that I should be with you

As Curtis says, living with people is a good developmental journey for the self. You realise how selfish you really are and how unaware your disposition can be. And constantly being in the presense of people feels like a never-ending game of charades. But all that will cease and I will learn heart-wrenching honesty and truth. I love this.

But it's time to face the truth.

I have come to realise that God is not in the business of making my life comfortable. He's not concerned about my happiness, about me getting the bus on time, about the tiny comfy things that make life all lala.

I wonder who gave us the rediculous notions that we, as human beings, had any rights in relation to God. I wonder who gave us the rediculous notion that the church, as christians, aren't called to lay down our societal rights to the calling of the cross.

It's ok. I will slowly learn that I am not the center of the universe, not even of my universe. How else can I expand into infinity and fulfilment, except to lose myself to infinity?

How can anyone go through life half-alive?