Monday, September 16, 2002

Really bad day somehow... it was all the trival things that seemed to weigh down so heavily.
1) Got yelled at and pushed around by Larry Choi i.e. Prince of the Undignified, SuperStutterer, and Mr. "I-love-giving-the-impression-that-I-never-had-a-date-in-my-life"
2) Math math math... Mundane as it is it is hell important to my self-esteem and self-assurance...
3) GP GP GP... Probably as weighted as the above.
4)

Really Good day somehow... it was all the trival things that seemed to lift me up.
1) Lit Lit Lit... did better then ever, praise god.
2) Dennis. thank you for always being there when i msg... and for having the wisdom to know when and how to reply... you always cheer me up. :)
3) "Hope your day has been bearable. Hang in there dearie *hug* the discomfort is (unfathomably) temporable. You are in my prayers" ... I believe in Angels. (In fact I've met a couple, they were sisters. Say hi to Anna for me k?)
4) The wonderful conversations with my friends. The jokes and riddles, philosophies, and reassurances. Yes, i do need you.

See? It balances out. I've survivied one more school day.

"Not dwelling on our pain for a moment more simply because we know it's all in the mind - is this escapism? Or is this being practical?"
Always felt we should go with what's best for us, what will speed up the healing process holistically... It needs a damned delicate
balance.

No I would not sleep in this bed of lies
So toss me out and turn in
And there'll be no rest for these tired eyes
I'm marking it down to learning
I am

Don't think that I can take another empty moment
Don't think that I can fake another
hollow smile
It's not enough just to be sorry.
Don't think that I could take another talk about it

Just like me you got needs
And they're only a whisper away
And we softly surrender
To these lives that we've tendered away

No I would not sleep in this bed of lies
So toss me out and turn in
And they'll be no rest for these tired eyes
I'm marking it down to learning
I am
Don't wanna be the one who turns the whole thing over
Don't wanna be somewhere where I just don't belong
Where it's not enough just be sorry

Don't you know I feel the darkness closing in
Tried to be more than me
And I gave 'til it all went away
And we've only surrendered
To the worst part of these winters we've made

I am all that I'll ever be
When you - lay your hands
Over me
but don't go weak on me now
I know that it's weak
But God help me I need this
I will not sleep in this bed of lies
-Bed of Lies~MB20-

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