Summer's Limbo

I find myself drifting from sunspot to sunspot, my world collasping into placid walks along perfectly manicured lawns. The fluffy summer sunlight showing the world to be comfortable patchwork of blonde and blue. There are cute speckled birds.

But there's a restlessness that wrestles inside me. I am not what I was bred to be. If the unversity could be personified into a single being of human calibre, he would look upon me in amazement and ask "So how is it that you don't know what NATO is? Why did I give you a degree?" On one hand, insecurity squeeks like the annoying hinges of an aged door. But that's just it, it's annoying, but insignificant as, afterall, I'm about to under go another 4 years of school. But for now, I answer calls and write proposals.

There is a sense of meaningless rotation in my life that is yet... meaningful in itself. I was thinking of my profound loneliness today. So profound it's not there. I have a loving boyfriend, a wonderful family and numerous confidants all aroumd the world. I am the least lonely person there is.

So I smiled and enjoyed the flowers.