Somethings need to be left well enough alone.

In the spirit of Yin-Yang and Chesterton. I am attempting to be extreme on both ends of the spectrum. Because really, both ends meet. Like East is West.

BREATH GODAMMIT FOR FRICK'S SAKE!

excuse me while I implode

Now's when I have to make wise decisions, and seize every moment.

Pat Barker is an amazing novelist. What wouldn't I give to write like her? I am increasingly convinced that different eyes see different hues of reality. It really is all subjective. But subjectivty doesn't negate the existance of concrete reality. The Man is short in relation to a tall man and tall in relation to one who is short. But he is The Man.

It really depends on who you are.

Three

1) If it's just the thought that counts, I don't know what you're counting.

And neither am I interested in it.

2) Choose your battles. Some are won by simply choosing to walk away.

You are worth the battle you choose to fight.

3) I don't want to live my life glorying in the excuses of my being.

I want to love myself enough to change me.

I love me just the way I am, and I am changing.

Yinging and Yanging it

Oh to be true! To love truthfully! To be ferociously wild and impeccably sane!

The waking hours of the semester are almost over.
I'm going to brush my teeth.

Backburner baby
You're gonna bring yourself down.

Last night, Mel and I had a conversation pertaining to being someone you're not. Of trying to fit into a particular role, idea, persona. Hell, of just trying to fit in. Unnaturally.

Well, what if that IS who one is? A person who is constantly trying to be someone he's not?

I have noticed that it is hard for me to get along with such. And then we talked of being 'down-to-earth'. What does that mean? Who is 'down-to-earth'? Do we like 'down-to-earth' people? or do we not?

You understand the earth. But you're not necessarily on it.
I choose not to be.
Yes.

And then I look at myself this past year, and a shadow of curiousity flickers across the radar. How much of me this year is me? who...? And then the shadow disolves into the light of the knowlegde that such questions have a time and a place to be asked.

And that time is not now.

Wake up and smell the coffee

Note to self: Do NOT get swept away. You do have the propensity for madness.

In other news, I drove myself home yesterday.
Seriously. In a Dodge Neon.

There is only one that goes far enough to span the distance in your eyes.

I think I've stepped off the craze train in my spiritual walk and have found myself alone on the platform of normality. Normal people, normal thoughts, and a normal existance: plain and placid. The river eventually meanders out into uneventfulness and sheds its load, the work of its passion.

no more, no more.

So I've shed apparent coherance for incoherance. For something stranger and yet more distant. My worldviews have been gladly disengaged and I think I'm about to take real existance a little more seriously.

This might explain my fascination with the aged. They are way more exciting then any youth.
Passion never fades, it only mellows into intense focus.

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh