I'm free. Of course it never feels as good as you imagine but I am nonetheless... ecstatic.

I'm still struggling with guilt. A guilt that gnaws every once in a while. A guilt that's not supposed to be. But it is. It's not a personal guilt, but more of a fear of social opinion, like shame, as if I'm obliged to cut even with every familar, curious face I meet on the streets. Not that they'd be interested. But I'd just hate to think of what's going on behind that "hey hannah! See you ard!" Not that it should matter to me. But it does.

Maybe I should just have more faith in humanity again. That if I do not judge, the chances are, others won't either.

It's not an outcome of a deliberate, concious action. But a need. A weak helpless cry from within, that renders us all bitches, sluts, bastards and jerks.

It's all car crashes.

Car crashes, TV shows
A drunkard on the side of the road
People running
Fantasy or reality
Analysis and theories
What does matter really?

Tell me what to believe
Won't you bring me order
Tell me what to achieve
Baby, so I can move forward
Tell me what to be
Car crashes, TV shows
A drunkard on the side of the road
People runnin', run

Credit cards in place of distress
Go live your life on the Internet
That's what this is
Conspiracies and mysteries
Science-fiction make-believe
My kind's misery

Car crashes, TV shows
A drunkard on the side of the road
People runnin'
All these car crashes in my head
Fantasy or reality
Analysis and theories
All these car crashes
What does matter really?
All these car crashes