I'm spent.

"If your glass heart should crack and for a second you turn back...Oh no, be strong"

So Seth comes over to collect donuts from seattle and to chat. The grieving isn't over for me yet, date-line is set for the 18th. But I know that the cracks are deep and wouldn't be completely covered for a while. Thank God for the reprieves. But having Seth over for the awkwardly shy, yet gentle contact was a step to healing. I think. I admit, it was like picking at the scab: feels good, yet hurts like a bitch after, might leave darker scars.

I feel turned over, moving on, different level, different plane, different timezone. What I want and what we were and what I used to be are shifting out of focus and I'm just going to have to keep moving.

There is only so much I can take, so I should stop taking more.

God this hurts. But not in the way I was expecting. Which is a good thing.