The Lord of the Rings speaks more of Christians then it does of Christ and Christianity. It's a communal story of faith taken by people who know no absolute truth but the love they experience. It's a tale of a journey, not with doctrinal facts but with the little that you know and the many that you love. And ultimately it's a brutal revelation of the true cost of goodness, and of love that bleeds.
I cannot carry it for you, but I can carry you
~ Sam to Frodo, at the foot of the mountain. Where he showed that you needn't answer a person's questions, or solve his problems to do what you should be doing as a friend.
And then there's the process of irreversible pain, as Shirley Lim states "some hurts are amputations", they never heal. In my journey to Canada and away from Dennis, and back here again only to find myself further from him, I realise as Frodo does that there is no returning. There are some wounds that time cannot heal. I know I've said this a thousand times and I will keep saying it, it's over.
Now here I am coming to the recognition of my need to geographical permanence to establish myself.
My dear Sam, you cannot keep being torn in two. You must become whole and one.
Alright. I will try. And soon, perhaps, I can be one, in two places.
I cannot carry it for you, but I can carry you
~ Sam to Frodo, at the foot of the mountain. Where he showed that you needn't answer a person's questions, or solve his problems to do what you should be doing as a friend.
And then there's the process of irreversible pain, as Shirley Lim states "some hurts are amputations", they never heal. In my journey to Canada and away from Dennis, and back here again only to find myself further from him, I realise as Frodo does that there is no returning. There are some wounds that time cannot heal. I know I've said this a thousand times and I will keep saying it, it's over.
Now here I am coming to the recognition of my need to geographical permanence to establish myself.
My dear Sam, you cannot keep being torn in two. You must become whole and one.
Alright. I will try. And soon, perhaps, I can be one, in two places.
2 comments:
Would you be his girlfriend again if he asks? You still love him, don't you.
You make it sound like an MCQ question, and if only life were that simple. Do i still love him? Can I ever stop loving him? given the amount of rage that I harbour within toward 'us', i doubt I can answer that in the negative, but what's the point if it's all smokey rage and contempt?
Would I date him again? Now? Tomorrow? If he asked yesterday? Next year? I don't know, do I look like the creator of the universe to you, that I would be all-knowing? And given the fact that we do not communicate and I am left to my own thoughts and devices, any conclusion i reach would not be fair. Relationships should never be unilateral and untill Dennis and I start developing some plane of commanality again, there seems to be now way about it.
All in all, I think that this whole question and answer thing was rather pointless. And made even more so by the fact that I am speaking to a non-person, an anonymous entity that ultimately becomes a non-factor in my thought process, considerations and life. Conversation and communication are always conducted in context of a relationship. Hence if I don't know who you are, I don't think I can communicate the extent of my being to you in a way that I would love to.
I'm sorry, but this was just a glorious waste of time. I'd meet up for a cup of coffee anyday, but please don't hide behind the 1's and 0's of the internet and expect me to give you the time of the day, which i already did.
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