Urmp...

Tongue-tied or what? I don't know.
*sigh*

I'm learning to breathe ever so slowly, take things in my stride and not be too personal.
Because, of course, in the grand scheme of things, I don't really matter.

Watchingmedie � an introspective.

On Saturday, November 20, 2004 I started to cry.

Trace the shape of my heart,
Till is becomes more familiar to your eyes.

caught sight of it all. and it just happened.

I�ve been lost without you,
Cold without your love.

Is that a good thing? Maybe.

You often misjudge your abilities
Overrate your level of sensibility
And perhaps end up with a gnawing hollow within.

Rescue me from hanging on this line.
I won�t give up on giving you the chance to blow my mind
Let the eleventh hour quickly pass me by,
I�ll find you when I think I�m out of time.

Maybe 13 months back, you really thought you lost your religion.
But you actually never did,

As clich� as it sounds, everyone has to have some time to grow, to journey.
Being loud and gregarious was simply a phase in your life
You know who you are. You really do.

Take the place of my heart, till I become a strange to my life
I�ve been down without you, wrong without your live
In time will I be what you�re thinking


There is absolutely noting wrong taking on different personas to suit different characters within the clique.
But it does leave you really stranded
You lose sight of yourself.

Rescue me from hanging on this line.
I won�t give up on giving you the chance to blow my mind.
Let the eleventh hour quickly pass me by
I�ll find you when I think I�m out of time.


Ian. I�m really really proud of who you are today.
I know that you can be quite the brat, and that�s who you are now.
But you are so beautiful.

Often, you show strength in your opinions and beliefs.
Ye you need to stop and listen sometimes but I love who you:

Are.

I�ve been down without you, cold without your love.
In time will I be what your thinking of?

I miss you ian. You were the one that grounded me.
Stepped on me and brought some challenge.

Rescue me from hanging on this line
I won�t give up on giving you the chance to blow my mind.
Let the eleventh hour quickly pass me by
I�ll find you when I think I�m out of time.

I�m always here for you.

Jar of Clay � The Eleventh Hour.

ENOUGH ABOUT ME

I realise, that I really just. don't. get. it.

Your ambition.

Over BBQ and QE walks I thought about where I was going and who I was becoming and what I wanted to be. I figured that maybe my whole get-up as a major thought-processing-machine and concept-generator was becoming passe. As usual I confuse the wine and the wine-skins and realise that I've missed the whole point.

I'm not trying to give my life meaning

So I am going to strip it down to the bare bones. Just raw flesh, sinews and You making me. I want to be small, I want to suffer for the prize to be earned, I want to be sharp, lean and sleek. And if the regimental mind is getting in the way, I'll give that up.

by demeaning you

So, I'm going to give up this whole Fi-Lo-So Cheemological outfit and concentrate on reality. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. And at the end of the hairy day we are left with the thinnest threads of gold, the relationships that should've been worked on, the people restored and the lives met.

and I would like to state for the record

So call me guys, if I am absorbed in my mind, in my papers, in my books and in my concepts. Flag me when I shuffle my identity unhealthily and cop out, and most of all, when I stop relating and being real.

I did everything that I could do

So here's to a good year of thinking and discovering and now I will do everything in my power to discard what no longer fits.

I'm not saying that I'm a saint
I just don't want to live that way

Meet me.

Indeed as someone told me, the best time to rest is inbetween countries. When you first touch down and settle in, nothing to do. no one to see, just you and yourself.

So I'm sort of resting, except now I'm about to pop over and visit a friend, then hop into another friend's car and head over to a BBQ. I just came back from lunch with another friend, we went to the same place where i had lunch with another friend yesterday. And the day before that i had dinner and attempted a movie with another friend whom I was reunited with during the bible study I went to the day before the day before, which was the day after i touched down.

And on monday itself, I climbed in through a window and hung out with Seth.
Tomorrow I gym with Elim.
Sunday I hang with Dave.

Monday I go to school.

I'm back. Attempting to be normal. Grateful for the Navs. Having food and unpacking. and just freaking out.

Becuase I am.

Hello Hannah

I'm on my way back to Canada.
I am scared.

People people!

Read my history!

I have grown.

Oh dear me. I screwed up my blog in an attempt to get my history link to work properly. It will heal in due time. I promise.

But for now. It is much too vile to look upon. Please give me a week or two, or a month. Or if God will send angels, 3 days. It will heal. I promise.

Hannah

Om...

You are dignified, spiritual, and wise. Always unsatisfied, you constantly try to better yourself. You are also a seeker of knowledge and often buried in books. You tend to be philosophical, looking for the big picture in life. You dream of inner peace for yourself, your friends, and the world. A good friend, you always give of yourself first.

The World's Shortest Personality Test

I'm not too sure about the accuracy. Esp the dignifed part. I'm really starting to miss my long hair. I'd like to be feminine, dainty and genteel again (if i ever was to begin with).

---

Once again.

Be very very very careful of who you invest yourself in.

It might be good, but it might not be worth it.

Let's be both wise, and good.