Monday, July 25, 2005

Go.

I have done much today and I am pleased. I enjoy really taking time to do things and making the most of everything that I do. I enjoy connecting with people and building the intangible. I think I'd make this a plan of action. To not senselessly waste time and to be pro-active in life.

Lunch with Lysandra was good. I enjoy her company and appreciate her taking the effort to ask me out for coffee/lunch. Sweet thing. There are great people out there. Once again the world surprises me with the fact that it is not all two-dimensional and predictably cold.

Made dinner with Sheena. The grocery part was a bit odd. I've never shared food this way before and I think I will have to let calculativeness go and grace flood in. This is learning in flesh. Dinner was awesome, so was conversation, cleaning, baking and laundry. Leon is a sweetie.

Stop.

Lingering in my past in an unhealthy obsession. I enjoy reading old blog entires to savour youth and childishness again. I find that things are very different from what I expected them to be. I think what hurts the most is reading about Dennis, and how much we had and how much I loved him and thought that we would be. I think I'm over it all, but really, to rip off the romance of DeBeers:

An Amputation is Forever


And for the rest of the world, please make sure that that rock you wear around your finger is conflict free. Both in South Africa and within yourself.

Wait.

-The person-
It is true that I connect with people quite well. I converse and talk and get comfortable with. But I wonder how much of that is really true. It's easy to play the social role. It is something that I picked up while doing theatre. A good actor delivers the part and makes it seem true. Believeable.

Stanislavski would make sure that it IS true. If you're about to do Hamlet, please make sure that you have sersiouly contemplated on whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing end them to die: to sleep; no more.

But I don't think I ever was a good method actor. I'm a snap. And the thing about snap, is that you rarely ever are the role you play.

But that's about enough for today. I'm going to get up and go.

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